What Is Meditation?
I'm terrible at meditation.
I confessed those words during a recent conversation. The person I was speaking with challenged me with a few questions I hadn't considered.
Compared to what? Why do you need to meditate? What do you assume you'll gain from meditation that might be missing in your life?
These weren't questions from someone unfamiliar with meditation. Quite the opposite. My new friend, Joe, had spent time studying meditation and spiritual practices in places like India and Tibet. But he also understood that mindfulness and meditation don't necessarily look the same for everyone.
I explained that I have a morning non-negotiable. I walk the dog for 20 to 30 minutes, followed by another 30-45 minutes of exercise in my home gym. That's where I get grounded.
When I walk the dog, I often start by saying, "It's going to be a great day," followed by all the reasons why. It's an opportunity to appreciate what's going well in my life and set a positive tone for the day.
I first learned the concept of mindfulness at a yoga studio in California. Our instructor would sometimes ask us to imagine a basket outside the studio door. Before class, we were to place our stressful day, our worries, and our to-do lists in that basket. Everything would still be waiting for us when class ended. But for the next hour, our only job was to be present, paying attention to our bodies, the poses, and our breathing.
I loved that imagery.
Today, when I exercise with one of my Peloton instructors, whether on the bike, lifting weights, or practicing yoga, I'm focused on the moment. I appreciate how the instructors continually remind us to breathe, especially during yoga, guiding each inhale and exhale as we move through the poses. Without even realizing it, I've left the distractions of the day at the door. I'm present.
As I started exploring the topic further, I learned that mindfulness is often described as paying attention to the present moment without judgment. Thoughts may come and go, but rather than getting caught up in them or judging them, we acknowledge them and return our attention to the moment.
Meditation is one way to practice mindfulness, but mindfulness can also be part of everyday activities.
Joe offered a perspective I hadn't considered:
"Maybe you're a great meditator. You're just not sit down and don't think for five minutes kind of meditator, but maybe you don't need to be, right?"
I believed that to be good at meditation, I needed to sit quietly, close my eyes, and focus on my breath for five or ten minutes. And because I struggled to do that consistently, I'd convinced myself I wasn't good at it.
Joe helped me recognize that while I'd been practicing mindfulness during yoga for years, I hadn't given much thought to how my morning walks and other workouts might provide some of the same benefits I was seeking through traditional meditation.
Interestingly, I do occasionally use guided meditation. When I can't quiet my mind enough to fall asleep, I'll turn on a five-minute sleep meditation. It's fascinating how rarely I'm awake by the end of those five minutes. Usually, I wake up an hour or two later, turn off the app, and thankfully fall right back to sleep.
I know people who love their 30-minute guided meditation. It's their daily non-negotiable, and I used to envy their ability to make it a consistent habit.
Now I realize that what works for them doesn't necessarily have to work for me.
How often do we convince ourselves we're not good at something simply because we're not doing it the way someone else does?
We see someone else's routine, process, or success and assume that's the standard we're supposed to follow. Meanwhile, we overlook the habits and practices that are already serving us well.
I'm not suggesting we shouldn't try new things or challenge ourselves to grow. But perhaps we should spend a little less time judging ourselves against someone else's definition of success.
Whether it's meditation, exercise, personal growth, or something entirely different, find what helps you feel grounded, focused, and connected to what matters most.
You may discover you're already doing more than you realize.
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